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Showing posts with label goals. Show all posts
Showing posts with label goals. Show all posts

Thursday, 17 May 2012

Getting Back At It

I have wanted to teach and do research for a long time. A very long time. When I found out that I was expecting, I swore up and down that it would not slow me down, that I would still finish "on time" (whatever that means). I would still graduate with my PhD, and would go on to teach at a university, and maybe even run a consulting business on the side. The possibilities were endless....

Now, 5 months post-birth, I find myself toying with the idea that maybe my priorities have shifted a little. Life just doesn't seem as simple as it used to. I can't just go to school and spend 6 hours working at my computer. I can't be present for all of the meetings and workshops I would like to attend. And to be honest, often I don't want to be. I love being home with McKenna and seeing her grow up. While I don't think I am cut out to be a stay-at-home mom in the long-term, I am enjoying this time we have together immensely. I'm starting to think that maybe my career ambitions need to be scaled back a bit to accomodate more of a family life.

Recently, McKenna has started going to a home daycare three days a week. Two of the days I am teaching, and the third day I have set aside to work on my dissertation. Tomorrow will really be my first real day back at it since I had McKenna. Sure, I have collected data since then, but I haven't sat down and written much of anything since December. I'm dreading it. I feel like I'm starting at the beginning again. I no longer feel like a curious, competent graduate student, I feel like a tired, overworked mom. But I want to do this. I am so close to being finished, and I know that I would always regret it if I gave up on this degree. Whatever it takes, I will walk across that stage someday soon. I just need to buckle down and force myself to get back at it.

Tuesday, 7 February 2012

New Baby Resolutions

I don't typically make New Years Resolutions. They're usually lame, and just give people another excuse to feel like a failure when they inevitable don't succeed at their goals. But this year I decided to make some "New Baby" resolutions - goals that I want to achieve not because of a new calendar year, but because of, and for, this new little person in my life.

The first thing I resolved to do was to get back at working on my dissertation. Between teaching a course, working 30 hours a week, and trying to keep a house clean, very little was getting accomplished towards completing my PhD. This is resolution # 1. I want to finish this degree so that I can start on my career and be able to provide for my daughter, as well as be a good role model for her. Not that I think that every mom needs to go out and get a PhD in order to be a good role model for her kids, but it's important for me to finish what I have started, rather than giving up or putting it aside when things get busy. Of course, the first day I tried to get back at some academic work, she decided to fuss and cry all afternoon. But that's life. The next good day she has, I am back at it!

Secondly, I want to start getting more exercise and living a healthier lifestyle. Those commercials on t.v. that talk about how today's kids have a shorter life expectancy than their parents scare the crap out of me. I want to make sure that I am around for her as long as possible. I want to be there for all of her big milestones, from graduating high school to getting her first big promotion.

And that's it. Those are my goals for the foreseeable future. Oh, and to be a good mom :)